The power to clap 14 times a second

The power to let someone control your dick

The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

The power of total invulnerability and immortality, stops working when you get hurt, or die.

The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

The power to elect George W Bush.

The power to produce a hand vacuum from your belly button that only sucks up lint for your belly button

SHAPESHIFT - only into a guinee pig

The power to turn your pants into underwear, but only when you're wearing them.

The power to find your lost keys only if the keys are in your pocket.

The power in which whatever you touch into a meme or prank.

the power to hovertate

Superhuman strength at the expense of being completely paralyzed

The ability to go forward in time for 1 second but the process of going forward takes 1 second.

The power to turn toast back into bread

The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

to create balloons out of anywhere on your body, and twist them into whatever you look at.

The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

The power to turn Justin Bieber into a cat and kill him 9 times

The ability to melt ice slower than it would usually melt

The power the ability to read minds but only on February the 30th 1783.

The power to uncontrollably fart when your with your girlfriend

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!