The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

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The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

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The power to smell through your arse.

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The power of absolutely flawless hindsight. -Credit to South Park

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The ability to die on command.

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The ability to control dairy products

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The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

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The power to fire lasers from my nipples.

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The ability to lift things up and put them down.

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The ability to recognize any meme at will.

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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being black

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the ability to only crap while on a toilet

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Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

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The power to hold your breath when you die

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the power to predict what you are going to post on facebook

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The power to shrink boobs by merely touching them.

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The power to kill someone with a knife

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the power to walk on land.

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the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

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The power to never be tired, but only when rowing a boat.

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The power to jump over any fence no matter how high! Good luck surviving the fall.

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All of aquaman's powers.

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The power to change your urine to any color

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!