The power to not being able to go use the bathroom when you have to

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The power to have two eyes that can't see very far or through anything.

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

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The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

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The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter higher than you usually can

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The ability to die on command.

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The power to be invisible but only in the dark.

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the ability to be a super genius but can't speak or write

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Immunity to curable diseases.

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The power to detect homosexuality in animals. ~scramjat

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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The power to instant nose-bleed, but not be able to stop it.

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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THE POWER OF PEDOBEAR!!!!! but only when theres law enforcement around

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the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

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the power to shape shift to yourself

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to make school 24 hours , and making vacations for 30 minutes.

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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The power to never come into existence

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The power to convert any font to comic sans at will.

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The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

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The power of being able to punch everything so hard that it explodes.........BUT you are not resistant to the explosions.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!