The power to shrink boobs by merely touching them.

The power to become perfect. Perfect: There can be only one moral man.

The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

The power to be a common person

The power to pause time and control every person you touch while the time is paused

The power to change into an Arab at will. Moral: Will not work inside arab-countries.

The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

The power to jerk off without using your hands

You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

The power to think of a good super power right now.

The ability to turn into a slightly damp sponge

The power to .... Make pointless superpowers! :D

The power to count exactly how many babies under the age of three weeks existed in the last 14 seconds.

the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

The power to like the fact that someone liked my status.

The power to switch genders, but you can't switch back.

The power the fly unless your alive. The power to swim in water unless your wet.

the power to suck at absolutly everything you do, except at failing.

The power to survive extreme temperatures, for extremely short amounts of time.

75% levitation

The power to make your girlfriend orgasm only when you are having sex with another man.

Have all the superpowers there is in one milisecond every 100 years (If your still alive)

whenever you want to sleep an anime starts happening in real life

The power to be and do whatever you want except living forever, only when you are dead

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!