The power to take edible shits.

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The power to give yourself a staticshock, every time you touch yourself.

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The power to eat sandwiches and never get full

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The ability when standing still you hover 1milimeter

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

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The power to hear in the dark.

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The power to shrink boobs by merely touching them.

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the power to predict the outcome of any event after it's already happened

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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The ability to fart extremely loudly every time you blink - but only when having dinnerwith your girlfriends parents for the first time.

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The power to pause time and control every person you touch while the time is paused

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The power to feel like you're gonna sneeze forever

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The power to be a common person

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The power to punch with the force of hulk ... But Die instintly

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the power to get sick

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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The power to annoy people with saying the same meme to then(Examples: WHAT ARE THOOSE,21 etc.)...

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to eat a pie and get to fart an apple (cus why not)

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the power to catch em' all

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The power to sense the emotions of inanimate objects.

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To shit bricks.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!