The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

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Ability to emit a low-level light, but only when standing near a candle.

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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Each time to show up on daily live TV each time you are masturbating.

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The ability to swim in water.

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the power to be powerless

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the power to fail at life

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The power to make everyone think that having no power is the ultimate power so everyone thinks they're powerful when they realize they have no powers but you have one so you win

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The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

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the power to make hate films against Islam... theres no space for bigots and jerks on this Earth.

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The power to fly when your in an airplane

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The ability to turn into a slightly damp sponge

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The power to walk at the speed of light, but not any slower.

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to find any film directed by Uwe Boll entertaining.

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The power to fall without screaming.

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the power to shoot knifes from ur pen*s hole.(ouch)

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The power to actually ENJOY Dora the Explorer.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter off the ground and be hungry and if you don't get food within a nano second you'll die of exposure to any form of matter

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the ability to solve paradoxes

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The power to ejaculate laser beams.

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the ability to dice a watermelon by looking at it but when you eat any of the diced watermelon a magic watermelon grows in your stomach and you look fat

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The power to moves in slow motion.

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The Power To Be Sent Back To Your Exam's And Then Getting All The Answers Wrong Making Your Intermittent Future A Dream And Your Mansion A Tent.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!