The power of superman while never being able to leave Krypton.

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To have the ability to piss off the police

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The power of x-ray vision but unfortunatly your blind

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The power to pronounce the word "rural."

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the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

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the power to open doors that are unlocked

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The ability to not slip on banana peels

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The power to melt butter with your mind when its hot outside

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The power to summon fire with the use of a match

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The power to die at will

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The power to turn into a lamp once.

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The power to have a atomic fart

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The ability to simultaneously implode and explode.

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The power to always know the exact time.

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the power to slitely change how you look by smiling

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The power to make people disappear bye closing your eyes

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The power to change into an Arab at will. Moral: Will not work inside arab-countries.

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The power to get laid by your right hand.

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The power to teleport to anywhere in the known universe, but not be able to teleport back

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The power to make Justin Bieber be dead but only when you are listening to someone good at singing

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The power to ejaculate out of your ears once daily

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The power to read minds, but only that of someone who is watching Twilight.

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The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!