- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to walk on very very shallow water (

The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

The power to open doors with your bare hands

The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

The Ability to shit studs once a week

EntirelyTooManyNapkins Man

The power of immortality, but only when you try to commit suicide.

The power to ride a unicorn without a horn that can't fly.

The ability to transform into anything... gradually, over the course of a week.

The power to run at 0.5mph

The power to like this power

The ability to innoculate against all non-existent diseases

the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

The power to be mario for 10 seconds then you vomit shit for 17 hours. this happens every week.

The power to telepathically fold paper.

The ability to breathe and swallow at the same time.

The power to volunteer as tribute.

Ability to eat a burger without going to the mall first and talking to your grandma there for 45 minutes about how it hasn't rained for a quite awhile and we could sure use some!!!

The power to be light and stand against darkness. Moral: FU Destiny!

the power to like charlie

Astral Projection. Distance: .3mm

The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

The power to forget what your superpower is

Pointless Super Powers