The ability to police irony

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The power to eat sandwiches and never get full

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to randomly self destruct at any time

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The power to look beautiful/handsome when nobody is looking at you.

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The power to have hindsight.

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The power to die whenever you feel the slightest bit joyful, happy excited, etc.

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the power to turn yourself into a toaster. once,

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the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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The power to know the end of every movie ever.

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the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

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The ability to be telepathic but only while sleeping. So you just think it's a dream.

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The power to enter the dreams of people who regularly have night terrors

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The ability to keep a song stuck in your head overnight

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The abilty to change what your hair smells like every two years

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The power to have any video game that you want along with its system but if you ever die just once you can never play that game again even if you get a new one.

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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make youself dumb

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the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

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The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

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The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

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The power to have the world's biggest cumshots, but to have a numb penis.

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The power to make people extremely happy as soon as you die.

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The power to stand in line at the DMV with a smile on your face.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!