The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

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The power to run at 0.5mph

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The power to have explosive diarrhea when people are looking at you.

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The ability to be blind, deaf, and mute at will.

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The power to only be able to eat poop

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No matter what you eat, always shit peanut butter.

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The power to not exercise.

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The power to turn grow a vagina that can whistle on your neck during a full moon.

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The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

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The power to teleport but you must have walked to that place within the last attosecond

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The power to shit out toilet paper.

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The power to make a small chair appear -- one time.

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THE BEST>>> TO PREDICT LOTTO NUMBERS 10 SECONDS BEFORE THE DRAW!!!!!

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The ability to get shot, for real.

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The power to think of witty comebacks 3 days too late

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The ability to police irony

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The ability to lift things up and put them down.

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The power to turn water into ice but only in sub zero temperatures

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the power to make an earthquake that an ant can not even feel

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The power to fold paper seven times

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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lol

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the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

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The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!