The power to grow your fingernails at 1.5% times the average speed, provided you contribute three hours a day to meditation.

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The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

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the power to misspell

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Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The power to turn into a pebble

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you do not need to eat but you have to sit

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the power of mind controlling...yourself

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The ability to cure polio, but only within U.S. borders.

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The power to think up a pointless superpower.

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the ability to do see through any girl's clothes but you must be singing a Demi Lovato song at 76.786 Decibels EXACTLY!

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The Power To Lick My Own Penis

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The power to turn vaseline into mercury whenever you think about throwing away a perfectly good taco

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Being able to be invisible when no one is watching.

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The power to get stuck to doorknobs in dangerous situations

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the ability to produce petrol from your ankles but only when you're on fire.

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the power that will cut off your penis and just growing it back for every hour of your life

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The power to be invisible only when you're not in anybody's line of sight.

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The ability to face reality after reading all the pointless powers

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Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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the power to be super ugly

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the power to tell have a alarm clock in your head that only go's off evry 30 secents and it deeps for 20 u cant take it owt or stop it lols

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the power two peel m&ms -jesse

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The power to teleport all gold to criminals and or teleport criminals to gold

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the power to fold a piece of paper in half 8 times

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!