The power to turn back time and get the word "emit".

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The power to have explosive diarrhea when people are looking at you.

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The power to breath Oxygen

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to shit out toilet paper.

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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The power to let Raj from big bang theroy talk to girls without alcohol

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The power to make every female cop want you... IN JAIL.

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The ability to change your weight

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The ability to know how to drive a car but only when piloting light aircraft

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The power to like any show

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The power to be hating when you see me rollin. Moral: ;D

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the power to turn food into shit

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The ability to unknowingly untaim domestic animals.

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The power to walk through air.

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the power to turn a care package on black ops from dogs to ammo

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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the power to make rotten food go good again, but only if it's exactly 2 months, 4 days, 9 hours and 13 minutes old.

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The ability to pee while standing up for men

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The power to jump higher than a speeding bullet and run faster than a tall building.

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The power to lick your elbow.

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The power to use your penis as a lasso.

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The power to shit diamonds, but only into magical underwear that turn diamonds into shit.

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The power to change laws if you're allowed to.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!