- Pointless Super Powers

to randomly self destruct at any time

The power to fold paper seven times

The power to think of witty comebacks 3 days too late

The power to die

to make your bowel work backwards

You can have anything you don't want at any time.

The power to bake cakes precisely 2.7% faster than usual.

the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

the power to get somewere at the same time that you arrive.

The power to eat your poop

the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

The power to enter the dreams of people who regularly have night terrors

The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

The abilty to change what your hair smells like every two years

To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

The power to recite 1,000 digits of pie, but only when you need to say the Fibonacci sequence

The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

The power to have the world's biggest cumshots, but to have a numb penis.

The power to stand in line at the DMV with a smile on your face.

The power to unscramble an egg, but only after you've eaten it.

The power to control yourself

The power to believe I type actual morals. Moral: At horsehead network? Now please go look for prostitutes at a church or astronauts under the sea you fucklng ass and blahblah!

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!