the power to shoot fireballs only when your underwater

The power to know you don't have a superpower

The ability to type incredibly fast when your keyboard is broken.

The power to be stupid

The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

The power to die whenever you feel the slightest bit joyful, happy excited, etc.

The ability to look at someone and die.

The ability to read Captch codes perfectly but not being able to type them correctly

The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline instead of childen

The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

The power to make someone forget you as soon as they laid eyes on you making you lonely forever:)

you do not need to eat but you have to sit

The power to change your eye color.

The power to see through glass walls.

The ability to excrete Hydrochloric acid, but only in your stomach.

the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

The ability to instantly make all your clothes vanish but only when you're in a job interview

the power to summon fire with a lighter

A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

The power to live,but only when you are dead

The power of making toast land butter-side up

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!