the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

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the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

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The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

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The Ability to shit studs once a week

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The power to never be surprised when the toaster goes off.

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The power to touch your toes

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The ability to write a pointless superpower, which was posted earlier without having read it.

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The ability to enter the gender's changing room with no one noticing but losing the ability to see and feel.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The power to uncontrally boop

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The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

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The power to lock open doors

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The power to not exercise.

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The power to never be tired, but only when rowing a boat.

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The power of superman while never being able to leave Krypton.

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The power to forget what your superpower is

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The ability to change your weight

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The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

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The power to spell 'a' correctly

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The power to know where the beef is

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The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

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The power to make every single person in the world hate you and want you dead.

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The power to always lie even when you don't want to and then you have to truthfully say that you were lying otherwise the closest person kicks you in the groins.

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the power to know when someone queefed

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!