The power to have uncontrollable amounts of earwax so when you put in earphones they get covered in earwax

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The ability to turn into a slightly damp sponge

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The ability to walk on water, but only if you're Jesus

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The power to think of the worst superpower.

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The power to not go to wor unless it's a work day and to not fell pain unless you get hurt.

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the power to consume yourself and use it as food (dosn't remove pain and will cause medical condisions)

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The power to fly 2mm above the ground

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the power to fly but only if your feet are touching the ground

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The power to cheat on your wife with your wife only if shes on her period

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the power to shout and make people piss their pants

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Having the power to stand still

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The power to stop typing about the power. IT'S OVER 9000.

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The power to smell a fart before someone lets it out.

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the ability to grow your nails at will.

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Super-slowness

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The power to shrink without the power to return to normal size

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The power to make your shit sink or float on command.

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The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

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The power to eat razorblades, but only when covered in a mixture of antifreeze, bile and tabasco sauce.

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The ability to breathe and swallow at the same time.

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The power to run super fast, but only while in space.

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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The power to shrink boobs. -Big C

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The power to reverse walk backwards.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!