The power to go super sonic speed as long as you are tripping

thumb_up thumb_down +125

the power to tell Austin Zachrich to go pee

thumb_up thumb_down +123

The ability to climb into your windows snatch your people up and find your kids , find your wife and find your husband and rape them . ( only active in linkin park )

thumb_up thumb_down +115

_/?\_ (?`_´) SON GET IN THE SCOUT TANK WE'RE KILLING THE SCAMMERS

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to grow or shrink your height by 6 inches at will, but everytime you do, you grow an extra toe.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to be immune to everything,except things that can kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The Power to breath while under a cup of water

thumb_up thumb_down +105

to walk 5 miles at 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 miles per hour

thumb_up thumb_down +103

The power to stop moral man from writing morals under every comment... Moral: The damn CIA cant go trough my battlestation, because I use this computer via proxy and can change my IP at will, so you literally would have to blow up the anti-bomb shelters in Micronesia and thus kill a key element of the pirate bay... And who would want that... buy your own music and movies? Download your own games? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

thumb_up thumb_down +103

the ability to solve paradoxes

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The Superpower to DEMAND thumbs ups! Moral: Is it really pointless? Consider this a social experiment of mine, I mean the "pewer" one made my day, thank you everybody, I am used to thumb my comments up myself so they stay a bit longer (being modest as always), thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to change TV channels once a day but only on cooking programs between 9:00AM and 9:30AM

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to never be surprised when the toaster goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

thw power to not feel anything during sex unless you dont like the sex (ie rape, ugly fat pearson)

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The ability to transform into anything... gradually, over the course of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to be constantly reminded of the game

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to become allmighty and imortal, all you need to do is to touch either Kryptonite, or adamantium.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

the power to eat bread

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to count the number of hair on your head.... Backwards!

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Astral Projection. Distance: .3mm

thumb_up thumb_down +81

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!