The power to climb trees really fast, but they shrink when you do.

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the power to talk backwards

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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the power to any ugly person love you.

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The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

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to make your bowel work backwards

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The power to pick your nose but you happen to be Lord Voldermot

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The power to understand irony.

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Because with the exception of a few good men... YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The power to run at the average speed of a normal person running.

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The power to be Omnipotent and create a rock too heavy for yourself to lift.

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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The power to become perfect. Perfect: There can be only one moral man.

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Be virtually indestructible, but only to things your not paying attention too.

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The power to troll.

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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The power to complete a 100m race in exactly 100 seconds.

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The power to be hating when you see me rollin. Moral: ;D

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The power to used any power i want when you're asleep

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The power to ejaculate out of your ears once daily

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The Power to make PotNoodle...

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the power to know when someone queefed

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!