The power to smell bacon and/or ham at 3 o clock in the afternoon on the second Saturday of March

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to be shitty

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The power to sit on a couch whenever your mother tells you that you can.

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The power to become Santa Clause, but only on the fourth of July.

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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The power to breathe fire but onle when under water

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The ability to make any girl hook up with you, while your penis is numb

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Perfect recall of every episode of Teletubies

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The ability to turn anything into a belt.

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The power to get hard at will.

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The ability to turn wine into water...

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The power to have a unique fart smell

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The power to breathe underwater but only if you are dry.

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The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

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The power to sing Friday by Rebecca Black perfectly when it's thursday.

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The ability to turn into an apple--but not be able to turn back.

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The power of reading the entire terms of service and understand it in less than 10 hrs.

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The power to know the answer to a test u already took.

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The power to make all girls look pretty but only in your head and only if you drunk enough.

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The power to cure cancer, but only on corpses

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The power to talk in any language but you can't talk in the language of the country that you're in.

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The power to survive in space as long as you have a working space suit on.

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X-Ray vision that only works on fat chicks.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!