The power to make your boss s**t his pants during staff meetings

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The power to see who is writing these powers

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the power of wanting to download paid games for free and always failing

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The power to burst into flames (Like the Human Torch), but immediately burn to death after doing so.

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The power to understand the farmer in Hot Fuzz.

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To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

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The power to turn into random objects

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The power to glow in rooms with reddish purple walls

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The power to get stuck to doorknobs in dangerous situations

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The power to overcome any addiction by constantly doing whatever you are addicted to.

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The power to transform any cutlery into a plastic spork, but only when you're in life threatening situations.

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the ability to make toast while standing on your head at 12:46 every Tuesday Greenwich Meridian Time.

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The power to temporarily give yourself a random STD.

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The power to turn into any cat which is about to give birth.

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The power to make people believe it wasn't' you who just farted

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The power to have explosive diarrhea after eating Chipotle

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the power to flick a coin and get heads 50% of the time.

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the power to only get an erection when a family member is looking

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The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

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the power to fly while under water

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Where to start? Ah yes...THE POWER TO NOT FREAKING DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to shit brix, No wait.

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The power to teleport yourself one step away

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The ability to read the recaptcha images

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!