the power to in power your self

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The power to make coma patients bark.

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The power to make birds levitate as you walk by them.

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The power to wait for the moment... TO THE NEXT WAITING MOMENT! And then the wait for the moment... FOR THE NEXT WAITING MOMENT

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Incredible Slothman. The power to move slowly.

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The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

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the power to be an incest pedo called jack sanders.

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The ability to part hair.

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The power to turn into birdseed

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The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

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The power to achieve 98% opacity

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The super power to power any electronics at will. But you need 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 Apms in your body to power a phone for 0,0000000001 seconds.

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The power to freeze ice

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The ablity to slap a policeman and get away with it.

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_/?\_ (?`_´) SON GET IN THE SCOUT TANK WE'RE KILLING THE SCAMMERS

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The power to be and do whatever you want except living forever, only when you are dead

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The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

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The power to read terms and conditions

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The power to find Waldo after the looking at the same page for over 6 hours straight

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The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

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The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

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The power to be able to run at the speed of light only when you have no energy to stand up

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The ability to recognize any meme at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!