The power to get your blackberry to turn on slightly faster

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the power to uncontrolably shoot bananas out of your hands

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The power of telepathy but only when you alone

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The power to fly for as long the average human is in the air during a vertical jump.

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The power to choose the next president of the united states of america.

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The power to die at will.

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The power to grow fingernails.

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The power to speak only one language

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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The power to breathe through your mouth when you have a stuffy nose

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The power to shape-shift, but only into: Rebecca Black, Justin Bieber, or Hannah Montana.

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the power to give your enemies all the super powers in the world

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The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

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the power to sleep through a prison rape

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The power to make a child in Africa die of starvation every time you sneeze

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A good Kisser

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The power to watch tv

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The power to eat ass.

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The power to teleport through open doors.

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The power to smell thoughts.

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The power to delete the "missing a finger" comment on shitbrix.com.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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the power to get free airplane flights but only to the place you are in

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The power to make you`re erections so big you faint.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!