The ability to speak Latin but only when no one can hear you

The power of turning poo into Adam Sandler movies

The power to throw fire out of your hands but at the same time burn your hands.

The power to only drink when your parents are watching.

The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

The power to let someone control your dick

the power to tolerate all the crap superpowers

The power to run light speed only when the world is speed up to light speed

The power to have withdrawal symptoms.

The power to summon anything you hate. Moral: Relax I hate morals too, if you ever find a moral here, then its not the original guy.

The power to shoot sperm out of your eyes

You dont HAVE to give my former comment a thumbs ups, I mean why should I care about your opinion and needs etc? Moral: But admit to yourself that it was awesome, or else you are just lying to yourself, doing ya a favor kiddo.

The power to make really bad jokes: knock knock who's there chicken chicken who no thats an owl not a chicken, you goose!

The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

the power to fart the alphebet

Crap out everything you're allergic too

The power to to think there are images in the clouds.

The power to walk on lava but you are not resistant to it

the power to win any shit eating contest.

The power to see your neck without a mirror

The ability to change races.

The power to sleep on road trips but only if you're not in a car.

The ability to use the "wait" function from skyrim/fallout in real life.

The power to become CHUCK NORRIS! (if you are a teen) Which by activation you realize he is just a mediocre actor... and worst... over 70 years of age...

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!