the power to walk up the stairs without losing your breath...

the ability to manually control your breathing

The power to have withdrawal symptoms.

The power to summon anything you hate. Moral: Relax I hate morals too, if you ever find a moral here, then its not the original guy.

the power to turn into a rock and you cant turn back into a human

The power to shoot sperm out of your eyes

The ability to teleport to any place in the universe, but only if it is currently occupied by something else

The power to make really bad jokes: knock knock who's there chicken chicken who no thats an owl not a chicken, you goose!

You dont HAVE to give my former comment a thumbs ups, I mean why should I care about your opinion and needs etc? Moral: But admit to yourself that it was awesome, or else you are just lying to yourself, doing ya a favor kiddo.

The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

the power to SHUT UP ALREADY!

the power to fart the alphebet

The power to poop in the worst time ever and you cannot control it

The power to complete a 100m race in exactly 100 seconds.

The power to to think there are images in the clouds.

Crap out everything you're allergic too

To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

The power to walk on lava but you are not resistant to it

the power to win any shit eating contest.

The power to see your neck without a mirror

The ability to change races.

The power to sleep on road trips but only if you're not in a car.

The ability to use the "wait" function from skyrim/fallout in real life.

The power to become CHUCK NORRIS! (if you are a teen) Which by activation you realize he is just a mediocre actor... and worst... over 70 years of age...

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!