the power to have a larger erection, but only when your alone.

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the power to animate condiments

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the power to grow hair 0.00000000001% faster

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The power to teleport the remote control to you from across the room twithout getting up, but only if your TV is broken.

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The power to dissasemble yourself, but not re-assemble yourself.

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The power to shoot billions of neutrinos from your hands at an enemy.

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The power to read the minds of the mentally disabled.

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The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

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the power to get an erection in gym class while doing jumping jacks

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The power to shoot 1 watt of lightning from your hands

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The power to run faster than you walk.

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The power to take control of mentally disabled turtles.

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the power to f**k your family all at once

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The power to taste the food you deficate

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The power to heal...... Your Opponent

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The Power to forget you ever had a power.

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The power to walk through a unlocked door.

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The power to kick ass when your names aoife.

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The power to trespass walls but only half their thickness.

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The power to teleport 1 inch but you can only do that once a week and it waists your energy for the entire week.

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The power to create tree sap.

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The ability to breathe naturally while thinking about breathing

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the power to only bring back the dead from june 1450

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!