The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

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The superpower to die in a 1 second.

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The power to make a woman make you a sandwich

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The ability to unknowingly untaim domestic animals.

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The power to urinate in mouth.

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The ability to turn wine into water...

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the ability to turn into the body of a car. Just the body, no engine, no wheels, nothin, just the body

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The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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THE POWER TO XLEAN UP STUFF WITH YOUR SUPER STRONG PUNCH

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The power to become yourself

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The power to lick your elbow.

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The ability to tolerate listening to Nick Cannon's albums.

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The power of telepathy but only when you alone

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The power to instantaneously switch hats.

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the power to like Hilary Clinton

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The ability to abruptly end conversations.

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The power to fart out of your hands.

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The ability to have udders for nipples.

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the power to be able to switch tabs on your computer two seconds after your parents walk in the room

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The power to be a gamer

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The power to control karma. Moral: Karma is a BlTCH! MY BlTCH!

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the power to be super ugly

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X-Ray vision that only works on fat chicks.

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The power to go super sonic speed as long as you are tripping

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!