The ability to push doors marked "pull"

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The ability to climb into your windows snatch your people up and find your kids , find your wife and find your husband and rape them . ( only active in linkin park )

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The power to know exactly how events would have turned out, had the last event gone differently

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to spelle caretly

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the power to kiss your own ass

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The power to make mace have no effect on your left eye - but double the effect on your right eye

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The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

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The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

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The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

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The power to see through things that are invisible.

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The power of self mind control

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the power to turn into a fish that is less then one mm small while only on land

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The power of funk, but only on Tuesdays between 2 and 3 AM.

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The power to excel at something that nobody cares about.

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The power to shit out toilet paper.

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The power to poop in the worst time ever and you cannot control it

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The power to let Raj from big bang theroy talk to girls without alcohol

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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The power to make some else throw up only if u throw up on them

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The power to be able to insult that piece of shit Chuck Norris without bein... YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! *dead* And of course the ability to type you`re death scream and you`re status after you`re dead.

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The power to read all these post's in less then a day

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The power to make every female cop want you... IN JAIL.

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The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

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Teh pewer off havin noo sentense speeled rite.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!