the power to freeze time by 10 secs but in the process freeze yourself too.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

the power to speak bulagrian for 28 sec every 37 day

thumb_up thumb_down -32

The power to turn into a lamp and stay that way till someone turns your light on.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

a power to turn liquid into goo!

thumb_up thumb_down -38

the power to win any shit eating contest.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

The power to watch a pot boil.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

The power to compare anything to porn because "you know it when you see it."

thumb_up thumb_down -90

the power to feed a dog peanut butter and not laugh

thumb_up thumb_down +145

The power to speak only one language

thumb_up thumb_down +131

the power to make broccoli taste like asparagus

thumb_up thumb_down +127

The ability to fart and pee twice in one go.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

The ability to count to potato

thumb_up thumb_down +121

To turn instantly water proof while eating a burito

thumb_up thumb_down +103

The power to shoot off your clothes at any moment while using your hands and feet

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to fart glitter at birthday parties.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to make pencils dull.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The power to have omniscience but can't speak and have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The ability to seduce women when there's no women in the room

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power of shrinking your own anus to subatomic size.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to shoot iron from your blood

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to throw a Boomerang and it always hit your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to wipe your ass with one confetti

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to undress using your mind...but only when in the presense of a rapist

thumb_up thumb_down +83

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!