The power to breathe underwater but only if you are dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to die early.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The power to transform your foreskin to rusty iron.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The power to drink bleach in a gatorade bottle

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The power to poop but only in bushes.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The power to paralyze yourself from the waist-up.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

the power to not have super powers...

thumb_up thumb_down +150

???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ??!l!q? ???

thumb_up thumb_down +144

The power to do 1d3 points of damage on successful touch attack twice a day assuming no spell resistance.

thumb_up thumb_down +140

The power to talk in any language but you can't talk in the language of the country that you're in.

thumb_up thumb_down +140

The power to invent things that have already been invented.

thumb_up thumb_down +140

ability to swim like a frog with no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +138

The power to love Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +134

Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

thumb_up thumb_down +132

The power to survive in space as long as you have a working space suit on.

thumb_up thumb_down +132

The power to always have the worst thing possible happen

thumb_up thumb_down +128

The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

thumb_up thumb_down +128

The ability to use the "wait" function from skyrim/fallout in real life.

thumb_up thumb_down +126

The power to be invincible to every thing but fire water tornadoes bullets explosions guns knifes blades swords grenades sticks pointy objects disease infections sicknesses flu illness natural disasters accidents vehicles trucks electricity meteors bombs rockets drug addiction peer pressure starvation tiredness torture pain monkeys radiation

thumb_up thumb_down +124

The power to rip open my shirt to show a s t-shirt

thumb_up thumb_down +120

The power to look extremely bored and emotionless when typing "lol" or "xD"

thumb_up thumb_down +118

The power to grow the most sexy tits ever. (If your a straight man)

thumb_up thumb_down +118

The power to die spontaneously, and have no one notice

thumb_up thumb_down +118

the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

thumb_up thumb_down +116

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!