- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to procrastinate so much, you don't even eat, and eventually die.

The power to drink dihydrogen monoxide without dying.

The power to fly but only when your on the ground

The power to achieve 98% opacity

The Power to lost your Dankness every time you Breath.

the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

the power to not die only when someone shoots you in your left heel.

The power to divide by zero

the power to teleport anywhere and see anything but every time to teleport there's 75% chance you'll die

The power to solve every problem in the world. By dying.

The power to teleport to the middle of the Pacific Ocean

Breath powers so strong your normal breath alone can break down walls whenever you get a cold.

The ability to be bulletproof after you get shot.

Your mom is so ugly, she was mercilessly bullied through high school and had severe depression and self-esteem issues. The power to post anti-jokes only on pointless superpowers.

the power to be able to foresee your death within a millisecond of it happening

The power to go in jail every time you are alone.

the power of breath 10 times per second of you will die

The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

the power of being yourself

the power to self destruct without hurting people.

The ability to make someone's heart stop, but only after they have died on their own of natural causes

the power to allow dumbass powers to be written on this site

The power to turn into an escalator

Pointless Super Powers