The power to expand the size of your head and gain weak telekinesis, but you die in 3 days, the bigger you make your head, the more powerful your telekinesis but the faster you die.

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The power to become invisible to anyone not looking at you or at your general direction.

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The power to be dead

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The power to hear other people's thoughts when they aren't thinking.

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The Power of Super Speed only when you climb a ladder

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The power to see the future, but as a blind person who can't hear or smell.

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The ability to fly at will but only if you are zoned out

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The power to do anything you don't want to do.

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The power to fly, have heat vision, lift heavy things with ease, and invulnerability.

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The power to produce 5 times the normal amount of ball sweat.

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Ability to shit nuclear waste

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The power to determine after 1 year that something is broken when you yourself have done it deliberately broken

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The power to see what happened in yesterdays future... Moral: meh.

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the power to shit liquidly

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The powers of findinf Waldo everywhere but in his books

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The Power To Melt into goop when you eat Delicious food

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The power to switch genders but you can't switch back.

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the power to erase your memory ffrom the last five seconds... but only if you are having a seizure

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The power to undress using your mind...but only when in the presense of a rapist

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The astounding ability to lay eggs instead of give birth.

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The ability of using their one true super power with stunning accuracy.

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The ability to teach someone how to blink.

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the power to smell shit from miles away

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!