The power to teleport yourself naked in front of your mom each time she is naked. (it cant be shut of)

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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The power to become a destructive green beast that demolishes cities, which you have absolutely no control over whenever you get angry or scared.

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The power to poop but only in bushes.

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The ability to turn invisible but only when no one is looking at you

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The power of having night vision that only works during the day

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the power to hear a dog whistle

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Der pawr tu speek kat langwage

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the power to glow in the dark during the day.

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the power to transform into pedobear with diplomatic immunity...

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the power of being cut off mid senta

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to be able to lift any weight of feathers

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The power to remember everything then forgetting it 10 seconds later.

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to get out of finger locks, only by switching fingers.

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The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

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The ability to turn invisible... when noone is looking

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the power to pee shit and shit piss.

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power to make your saliva taste like a 90 yr old diabetic old man who has tapeworms' poop

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The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

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the power to be extremely guilty in the bum.

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The power to remember every moment of your suckish life

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power to fly, but only if your inside an airplane

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the power to sh*t brix at will!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!