The power to speak with dead relatives, but only whilst masturbating.

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The power to become square shaped each time you are on fire. Moral: Try rolling on the ground now bitch...

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The ppwer to say SHAZAM, Then someone says wat?

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To get to know everything Jack Nicholson has said yet you blurb out his comments and random and by the time you face this YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: You think this entry was boring? It is great actually, what? You say it sucks? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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Writing "because moral man loves you" Moral: I am far too antisocial to love everyone, I mean the more love for me the better... so I can give a lot to my girlfriend too... love you baby! (my girlfriend duh) Moral 2: Someday ill tell her that I type this comments, and if you thumb this up, she will find out I declared my love here too... aww... love the man that does not love you... for love! Me: Huh? My head is spinning... and if yours is too, then thumb this comment up.

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The power to waste your time making a pointless website so that other people could waste there time.

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the ability to lick your own anus

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to vote in a republican democracy.

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the power to vote

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the power of wanting to download paid games for free and always failing

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The Power of Super Speed only when you climb a ladder

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the power to breathe under water but only when yourout of water

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the power to control urine

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The power to stop time but if you do so you will also stop.

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The power to think you love her but you don't.

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The power to touch someone's face while watching rain burn.

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The useless power to write about useless powers...

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the power to shit bricks

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The power to die when you do Anything!!!

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The power to pick something up and stay the same but smell bad.

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thye ability to think that your in a buble and everything is flat

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The power to ma-FUK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSY

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The Power to stick your head up your ass. Aka be a politician.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!