The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

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The power to drink bleach in a gatorade bottle

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The ability to have every possible thought as fast as the Flash is capable of moving and faster and know how every scenario can, will, and most likely will play out, yet you cannot say anything about them and they cannot be put to use. As well as no one can read your mind or anything similar to obtain said knowledge.

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The power to fly, but only when pigs do

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The power to blink a nano second slower

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Hearing so good a raindrop will deafen you

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The power to grow your toenails, but only one at a time.

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The power to sleep on road trips but only if you're not in a car.

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The power to be immortal, but only on 29th February.

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the power to fly while under water

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

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The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

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the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

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The power to see 147 billion years into the future.

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The power to drink dihydrogen monoxide without dying.

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The power to be a walrus

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the power to not die only when someone shoots you in your left heel.

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The power to rain fireballs down upon those you love.

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The power to jump 3% higher than the average human,

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The power to secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes every time you secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes.

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The power to transform into a baby only when around pedophiles.

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The power to drink lethal poison without getting ill. But still dying from it.

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The power to sleep with your eyes open, but when awake, to have ur eyes closed.

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The power to party like it is 1999 despite it being 2011

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!