The power to put everything off till the last possible day

the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

The power to fly only when in a car.

the power to lose your power at will

The power to be able to mate with squirrels and have offspring.

The power to produce fish eggs from your left eye

the power to spontaneously shoot glitter out of your ass

The power to control an army of termites to eat any wooden object, as long as the object is from IKEA

The power to walk forward and walk backwards at the same time in a lying down position while your asleep having a wet dream about goat puppies.

The power to levitate mustard.

The power to have YMCA or "In the navy" play explosively loudly from your nostrils and be immune to it yourself. Moral: WE KNOW YOU ARE H0MOSEXUAL ALREADY! TURN THAT SHIT OFF!

The power to be white and have a the pingas a size of a black man. Moral: You cannot comprehend the power of the dark side.

The power to throw your crotch as a powerful one time grenade.

the power to wiggle your own arms in a weird fashion

[insert pointless super powers here]

The power to have a second brain, but it has the IQ of a rock.

The power to not move or do anything.... at all

the power to be on time daily, but only after ur late

the power to tie your shoelaces with one hand

The power to think of any superpower but not have it

The power to conjure chairs at will.

The ability to tolerate listening to Nick Cannon's albums.

The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

the power to change the size of your thumb when ever you want

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!