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Parent Failure
Pointless Super Powers
Scumbag Steve
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The power to smell like a beacon and be delicius
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+128
The ability to give yourself brain cancer at will
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+122
the ability to walk through your clothes
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+82
the power to have a pointless superpower
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+74
the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.
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+74
The power to smell your own feet without taking your shoes out.
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+74
Tits for a guy.
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+58
The power to have a small penis
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+58
The power to breathe under water, but only when you're asleep.
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+56
the power to be .13 cents short on every purchase you try to make.
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+52
the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.
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+48
The power to pee quietly in public toilets.
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+40
Clairvoyance, but only when your mothers having intimacy with your dad.
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+28
The ability to turn door knobs with your feet every other even day.
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+12
The ability to break the fourth wall. Thank you for reading this pointless super power, please like it.
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+10
The power to troll.
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+6
The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)
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+6
The Power of being Friendzoned
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The power to generate lottery numbers which don't win
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-2
The ability to talk to snakes but only if you have a lightning bolt scar on your forehead.
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-4
The power to run as fast as a cheetah! Moral: A dead cheetah...
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-6
the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).
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-8
Gas station quality laser pointer vision.
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-20
The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.
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-22
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Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!