I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The power to mentally unlock any lock you can see, but only if the key is within 10 feet of where you are.

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The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

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The power to be stupid

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The Power to Die instantly.

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The power to drink poison and survive 6 hours longer than any other person

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The power to talk to animals only when they don't want to talk to you.

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the power to move something right next to you

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The power to see into the future of the past

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The ability to have all of the money in the world, but then have to share it with everybody in the world.

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The power to fall asleep at will. But it's only active when you're asleep.

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The power to know when an item of food has been cooked to perfection, 38 seconds after it has caught fire.

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to travel in time....2 minutes in the past exactly after..masturbation.... masturbation-time-loop...........

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The ability to talk to and have a conversation with boxes

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The ability to sense any and all ham in a five mile radius.

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The ability to teleport to the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.

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The ability to say YOLO without getting shot.

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The power to talk to people miles away.

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The power to spontaneously break into song only during absolutely tragic moments.

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The power to have backround music in your life.

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the power to suddenly have suicidal thoughts

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the power to control your own body movements

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The power to fly upwards but not downwards

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The power to see through glass. Oh wait.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!