The power to have as much fun typing these as me. Moral: Of course you possess no such "useless" superpower you sad loser!

the ability to be governor and have an Argentinian mistress

the ability to smile a tooth grin while pooping on your own chest

The power to see what's behind you.

The ability to print random memes on their tongue, but it has to be one that everyone in the room has seen before.

the power to fart every time you blink

The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

The power to feel pain when ever you want

The power to eat toilet paper and crap self-wiping poop. Think about it...

The power to only make burnt toast

The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

the power to blind and nausiat yourself for 12 hours straight with no way to stop it ohh and the power the eat hairy dicks

The power to be able to not smell fart

The power to have an ejaculate in your pants by looking a girl in the eyes.

The power to not lie wall you activate"I Agree To TheTerms Of Sevice"

The power of 2 milliseconds of omnipotence followed by death.

The ability to transform escalators into stairs.

Meatvision.

The power to slap your buttcheeks together, then transform into a head of cabbage.

The ability to part...hair.

The power to get extreme orgasms random, often in very awkward situations.

The power to fly at the speed of sound, but only at ground level with your eyes closed.

The ability to control water but only when it is raining

the power to know you forgot somthing but not know what you forget

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!