The power to bring Magic: the Gathering cards to life, but only the land cards.

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The ability to never have to take a shit again

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The power to read any language but you cant understand anything it means

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The ability to talk like Robert DeNiro on helium

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the power to make youtube videos buffer twice as fast on your iPhone.

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The power to be more human than most people.

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The ability to see through clear, colorless glass.

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The power to turn into a parking lot.

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The power to be always invisible, but can't interact with the objects or humans, only with animals.

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The power to be attracted by bullets

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The power to do your homework, but only when you're in the class where the homework is due

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To connect to the Playstation network with your mind! Who would want to?

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The power to see events happen 0.04 seconds AFTER they occur

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The power of believing you have a real power when you don't (which doesn't make you have a power at all, and consequently, turns into a paradox). Self-paradox man!

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to change what time it is 1 time per week

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the power to get a free game but can't play it.

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The power to thumb down Moral Man's posts. NOTE: It is required that the user of this ability possess average to above-average intellect. Seriously, bury this dickbag's posts. He's an annoying twat.

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the power to believe that im not a superior being......just a regular guy!!!

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the ability to die once you have died

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The power to breathe underwater, only in sewers.

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The power to give your wife rights

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The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

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The power to seduce any woman by saying dorito, but you dont have any genitals.

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the power to sell jars of bodily fluids for $25 each but get arressted shortly after

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!