The ability to sling web like Spiderman except you can only shoot webs from your butt hole.

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The power to walk 1% faster.

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The powers to know every martial art ever when your neck is broken.

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The power to see as Stevie Wonder

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the power to be on time daily, but only after ur late

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The power to fly whenever you get a stroke. (The power goes away as soon as the stroke ends, so make sure to get all your flying deeds done while you still have a stroke)

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The power to only be able to mind control goldfish one at a time

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An ability to exist without any food but only after you eat some food.

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The power to like this comment while you can't like any other ones.

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The power to accept the terms and conditions

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The power to see in the dark, unless your awake.

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The power to teleport 10 years into the past just by sneezing. You also become hyper allergic to everything. And of course, you have no way to travel forward...

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The ability to clean

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The Power to Combust

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The power to always reach just half an inch away from the spot on your back that itches

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The power to make apples into pennies one per day.

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Having the ability to get Bulimia by looking at yourself in the mirror.

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Retractable Teeth

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The power to hear morse code.

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The power to uncontrollably make your clothes dissapear and only in church.

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The power to sneeze scissors

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The power to take any object you are holding and swap it with anything within thirty feet

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the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

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the power to get every girl, that you're not into.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!