the power to persuade every 80 yo into penetrating you analy

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the power to never laugh at funny things but laugh nonstop at all other times

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the power to shrink down to the size of a quark but then you turn into a black hole and destroys the universe.

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The power to perfectly sing any song by Justin Bieber

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The power to die at will.

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The power to communicate with inter-dimensional beings, but they're reeeeally annoying.

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The power to feel pain when your drinking acid.

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the power to become friends with your least favorite teacher on facebook.

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The power to give epilepsy to hamsters.

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The power turn a $100 bill Into a single $1 bill

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The power to shoot milk through your eyes

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The power to shrink your penis.

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the power to orgasm more than once in one round of sex. the thing is, after the 4th time, it gets slightly uncomfortable.

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the power to fart in 7 different colors

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The power to touch anything that is touchable.

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The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

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the power to turn star wars figurines into sticky notes, only on sunday afternoons

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The power life like a hermit.

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The power to fly at Mach 3 but only if your in the air, but too bad cuz the power comes at a cost which is making you weigh 21 more tons than you used to weigh.

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The power to run at the speed of light, but are paralyzed from the neck down.

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The power to explode or fly at mach 10, but those powers can activate involuntarily, without warning

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The power to hear everything in pig-Latin.

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The power to wear your shirt backwards all day.

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The power to see in to the future of one second

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!