The power to make anything into toilet paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +121

The power to meme 20% harder

thumb_up thumb_down +115

The ability to wear one shoe on both feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +111

The power to be scared shitless and run around like a retard for about 100 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to believe people will vote for you`re comment, which starts WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY in the back.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

the power to see when the lights are on

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to only be physically attractive to blind people.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to go forward in time so you get defeated faster

thumb_up thumb_down +71

captain obvious

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to believe in yourself, when you can believe in me. Moral: BECAUSE I BELIEVE IN YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Q: What is 1+1? A: An equation.... Duh...

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The power to order stuff online with your dad's credit card

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to instantly faceplant when jumping

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to have tacos appear in front of you, only to have them stolen by a black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The power to transform water into urine with just drinking it.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

The power to turn invisible but only when no ones around

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Smell chick peas from over two miles away

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The power to get rid of feminism

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Turn gold into lead.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The power to get hurt every other hour

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The power to never drop something, as long as it is touching the ground. - JC

thumb_up thumb_down +27

being able to blow up and die

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The power to turn coleslaw into cabbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!