The power to breathe but only when your dead uncle breathes

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The power to levitate mustard.

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The power to turn back the clock at will. Not time, just clocks.

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The power to turn your external hearing off, only to replace it with the sound of very, very slow internal dubstep.

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[insert pointless super powers here]

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the power get massive erections but you are only aroused buy new born babies or near death old men and women.

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The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

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Liam Brudenell

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the ability to make real zero dollar bills

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The power to eat three times a day.

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To be able to levitate one object in front of you for one second a day

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The power for electronics to slowly deteriorate and completely break in just 6 months

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The power to wear crocs.

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The ability to consume nutrient of the object what you swallow.

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The power to take a pill without drinking anything.

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The power to smell like poop once every hour.

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The power to eat gumbo with a fork.

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The power to get any car you want but once it runs out of gas you have to get a new one and can not be the same model.

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the power to fly if you are touching the ground

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ability to smack the crap out of austin calhounh and laugh at him

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The power to find treasure, when you try to look for it.

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The power to be away from the Internet without getting bored.

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The power to speak using their mouth

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The power to know what Willis is talking about.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!