The power to swim very fast in shallow water.

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The power to shapeshift, but only when below ground.

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The power to be a dog, with Herpes, that smells like farts.

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the power to shoot lasers that are invisible and do nothing

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The ability to turn hamsters into pineapples.

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the power to give yourself cancer that you can't get rid of

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The power to uncontrollably laugh and point at every black guy you see

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A book on how to solve a paradix

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The power to pee out blue

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The power to see every rainbow in double rainbow.

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the power to gain the intelligents of amy childs' less intelligent younger sister

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The power to read minds only when people are thinking of broken pencils in a bowl full of acid.

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The power to turn Coke into Pepsi

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The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

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the ability to manually control your breathing

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i like pie.

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The ability to be frequently run over by an invisible car.

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The power to levitate a lamp 4 inches off the ground... Once...

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The power to die

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The ability to day nearly motionless while binge watching internet videos

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The ability to put on a glove that is slightly too large and have your fingers grow to fit the glove.

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The ability to add any two numbers and get 5

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The power to never finish your sentences because

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the power to live forever but you'll die if you don't eat 100 coach roaches a week

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!