the power to fly but only upward

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The power to control an army of termites to eat any wooden object, as long as the object is from IKEA

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The power to turn into wood by rubbing salt on yourself

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The power to come back to life just by yelling: I LIVE AGAIN! Or RESURRECTION! (which is not easy when you are dead)

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the power to read and agree to the terms or service

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The power to make fish appear in pants.

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The power to remove any fart smell from a room by taking ten deep and loud inhales through your nose (only five for girl farts).

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The power to make rain stop, only on sunny days.

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the power make tomatoes turn green.

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The power to type anything you want the same time you think of what you want to type.

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The ability to summon Cthulhu automatically when you reach the age of 23.5.

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The power of x-ray vision including mild radiation and only seeing bones

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Q. How many police officers does it take to arrest a mexican [DARREN ROWLAND]? A. 4- 1 too arrest him & the 3 other to hold his oranges!

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The power to get a boner at unpredictable times.

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The power to commit suicide.

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the power to grow mustache combs from your fingernails, but lack the ability to grow facial hair

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The power to smell farts nearby

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the power to fly if you are touching the ground

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The power to find treasure, when you try to look for it.

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The power to have no one hack your computer as long as you are not using a computer.

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The power to achieve world peace but only at the expense of your own happiness and the lives of all your friends and family members and everyone will hate you for no reason after doing so.

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The power to transform into a 37 year old World of Warcraft playing virgin

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Zebra Man has the power to change color from black to white and back again, at will

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The power for everyone to believe you, but only if you are telling the truth.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!