the power to fly, but only at the speed of light you, for less than 1 second, but you must land at the exact same spot you started and your mind cannot comprehend anything any differently than a normal human

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the power to become Homer Simpson's mom (R.I.P. her)

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mint berry crunch

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The ability to quit smoking by giving yourself lung, heart, and throat cancer, coupled with enphysema.

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The power to ejaculate at command

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the power the convince people if they agree

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The power to impress a mentally disabled person by doing absolutely nothing

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the power to be an incest pedo called jack sanders.

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The ability to hide your cats right ear at will

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The power to jerk off with no hands.

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The power to bread toast!

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The ability to freeze-frame yourself. Forever.

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The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

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The power to be first on any form of media (youtube powers).

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The power to die,but only if your alive!

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The ability to be smart, but only if you study for the first 18 years of your life

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The power to create a slight aroma of cucumbers

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the ability to levitate

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The power to eat the booty like a poor person's groceries

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The power to turn into any edible object in a restaurant.

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The ability to turn into a tree in the amazon rain forest everytime you burn your pinky finger.

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the power to summon a pen, once

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The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!