the power of anything you do makes you high and drunk

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the power to eat bread

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The power to be asleep while in bed

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The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

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The power to create mysterious stains on your clothes.

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The power to know what you would look like if you were ugly.

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The power to keep up with the kardashians

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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The ability to transform in to a glass of water

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The power to look TV

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The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

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the power to hover an inch above the ground once every month.

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The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

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The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

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power to drop the soap in the jail shower room

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The ability to not slip on banana peels

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the power to uncontrolably shoot bananas out of your hands

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power to permanently shrink one eye.

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to become famous on vine

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The power to think your dreams are real.

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The power of slowing down your reflexes respond whenever you want.

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The power to have a pointless power.

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The power to give people std's during intercourse

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!