- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to breathe but only when your dead uncle breathes

The power of being negative all the time.

The power to become mentally retarded only when you get an erection.

the power to make your nipples dissappear

The power to give yourself the most intense orgasm of all time at will, but it only lasts for a millisecond.

The power to create a pointless superpower

The power to... We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

the ability to add edges to any circle on anything that you can write on

The ability to avoid work when connected to the internet. Thanks, by the way.

The power to lower your own ego.

The power to be invisible, but only when no one's looking.

The ability to melt ice slower than it would usually melt

the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

the power to stop masturbating every day

The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

The power to laugh so hard you can't breath at "Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?" Jokes.

The power to be Chuck Norris's bitch.

The ability to pull open push only doors

The power to wish you had a power

The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

the power to turn everything you touch into gold......deja vu?

The power to enlarge your penis to any size, but only you can see it.

Pointless Super Powers