The power to believe I type actual morals. Moral: At horsehead network? Now please go look for prostitutes at a church or astronauts under the sea you fucklng ass and blahblah!

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The power to go forward through time to a second from now. I wonder if I still be in this world then when I use that power though.

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The power to turn 12% invisible.

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the power to eat when your hungry

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The power to disguise as an old woman but only with a proper costume and 20 minutes of time in a bathroom to get the make-up done properly.

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The power to turn freshwater into saltwater

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The power to think of a perfectly good comeback three days later.

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the power to ejaculate lava.

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The power to die on command.

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The ability to look at someone and know the exact number of times they have farted in the past year.

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The power to write the top rated Pointless Superpower.

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the power to poop forever and pee forever. ,the power too teleport 1in.

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The ability to be a plonk and post 'Pointless Super Powers' that aren't pointless and are could actually be quite useful.

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The power to get you`re dick stuck to a huge, heavy metal bar no one can lift nor move, either you stay there till you die, or you grab a knife and...

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The power to fly really fast, but only in one direction (down).

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The power to beat bad ass kids without getting arrested!!!

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The Power to float on water, except when you're wet..

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The power to regenerate limbs, but twenty years after you've lost it.

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the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

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the power to become Homer Simpson's mom (R.I.P. her)

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The power to summon a spray of bullets going everywhere in the room, and bullet-vulnerability.

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The power to bingewatch an entire season of a TV show in only five minutes, only to not remember any of it and have to watch it all again through normal means.

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The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

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The power to teleport to Mars, but only when your not wearing a helmet and you must stay there for a maximum of one hour.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!