The power to get you`re dick stuck to a huge, heavy metal bar no one can lift nor move, either you stay there till you die, or you grab a knife and...

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the power to turn wine into water.

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The power to pee while standing up

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The power to fly really fast, but only in one direction (down).

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The Power to float on water, except when you're wet..

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the ability to wake up on an elephant

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the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

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The power to fly while masturbating.

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The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

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The power to bingewatch an entire season of a TV show in only five minutes, only to not remember any of it and have to watch it all again through normal means.

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The power to control unsalted butter very slightly with huge amounts Of effort

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The power to quote memes randomly

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The power to shrink boobs

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The power to fall in love reptiles

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The power to fly at 0.00000000000000001mm off of the ground at a speed of 1 mile per hour whenever you desperately need the toilet.

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to power to pick your nose without anybody seeing

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the power to sing like an angel... but only if the song is "friday" or "baby"

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The superpower to detect when someone is racist.

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The power of omnipotence and omniscience but you work in such mysterious ways that youre both invisible and intangible and without will to do skwat. Oh wait that sounds like...

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The power to bend time and space in a way that would do nothing.

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the power to give yourself sunburn

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The ability to become sexually attractive to Killer Whales

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Power to instantly turn drunk

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the ability to make a really long post ajsfffffhkshgdddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddfgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggjssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssa

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!