The power to have an internal monologue voiced by Morgan Freeman.

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The power to make a woman make you a sandwich

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The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

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The ability to turn into a melting crayon for $20

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the power to walk on land.

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The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

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The power to sit for extended periods of time in front of the computer doing pointless things. The person who is reading this has that pointless superpower otherwise he would be doing something productive.

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You can hear what people think ...in sign language.

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The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

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the power to time travel to the present

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The power to remember the funniest thing in the world and have a full on laughing fit, as long as you are at a funeral.

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The power to predict the present

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to see through glass

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the ability to get the chills when someone close to you has an erection.

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the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

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The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

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The power to smell a fart from a 500 mile radius.

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The power to cook pop tarts really fast

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The power to be invisible to everything but security cameras.

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the power to see everyone as a tree

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The Power to believe you have superpowers

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The power to sing like Justin Beiber.

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The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!