The ability to go to hell.

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The power to walk on very very shallow water (

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The power to pull any woman that just asked you for a shag.

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The Power To Only Be Able To Move Yourself (including wheelchairs and all that) 1 meter in the entire life of the universe

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the power to give yourself cancer that you can't get rid of

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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The ability to stretch your arm towards an object thats in a reachable distance then clench your hand around the object and pull it to yourself.

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power to age faster

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The power to give the wrong directions

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the power to crap out bite-sized super heroes.

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to make your bowel work backwards

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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The power to have any nice guy, but they're all gay.

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The power to sneeze scissors

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The power to make your left hand glow whenever you put your right hand up your ass.

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the power to sleep while standing!

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The ability to cure polio, but only within U.S. borders.

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have the power of making chicken appear when your a vegan

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to smile uncontrollably.

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The ability to find a use for High School Algebra.

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The power to have time when you're doing nothing.

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the power to be like charlie sheen and relize that my score is 0

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!